06 April 2008

April Ambivalence

Well, Friday was interesting. High winds. Tornado warnings. Sirens wailing. Students being moved from one part of the library to another section.

The college offices closed earlier than normal that day. Fortunately, I didn't lose power at the house.

I had thought about going to Crossroads that evening, but I didn't. I had read that there were a lot of places without power, and I really didn't want to travel. I considered going out to Crossroads functions Saturday evening, but I didn't.

Lately, the first week of April has become a time where my feelings can be ambivalent. When I feel this way, I don't need to be near bars.

The last time I felt this way during this time of the year was three years ago, and I had way too much to drink. I didn't want to risk repeating that performance, so I didn't go out Saturday.

I did go out today to Crossroads at Parkway. I saw some movies-- mostly short films and documentaries. I renewed my film society membership. I also purchased a t-shirt.

I had a good time. Because of that, there's a part of me who wishes I did go out to see and be with friends Saturday.

That being said, I don't like to make a fool out of myself though. I don't like to lose control.

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